but i want to make these mistakes i deserve to make mistakes

but i want to make these mistakes
i deserve to make mistakes
and i deserve the consequences.
i'll do absolutely anything to
forget about the sadness or the
emotionlessness,
the painful standstill in my heart-
where i give nothing away and
i'm just stoic.
i need a few mistakes to forget it all.
i deserve a few with all the sh/t i've put up with.