in his arms
Chapter 63
“Do you remember
that hello?” I asked him as I laid on the couch. Anthony
sat on the chair beside me, his head in his hands, but with my
words he was instantly alert.
“What?”
“That hello. That hello that started everything.”
And everything that we would become and endure all started with a very simple, “Hello.”
He grinned. “Of course I remember that hello.”
“The hello that started it all,” I breathed, closing my eyes.
He laughed shortly, sitting back in his chair. “What would we do without Nurse Martin?”
As I thought of her face, I couldn’t help but smile. “We wouldn’t be here, that’s for sure.”
“And that bucket list of yours wouldn’t be completed.”
I mused this for a moment. “Can you get that for me?”
“The bucket list?”
“Yeah, and a pen.”
So he did, and he returned with the paper. It was heavily torn now.
“Why’d you need that?”
“I have to cross off number three.”
“What’s that?”
My eyes met his. “Find the thing that makes me happiest.”
3. Find the
thing that makes me
happiest.
* * *
I had begun to eat less and sleep more, and I would grow sleepy at random times of the day. Like, maybe at around eleven in the morning, though I’d only been awake for three hours.
Everyone seemed to understand, and wanted to help out. My mother brought me lunches and Morgan and Aidan kept me occupied with stories and they attempted games, but the games only lasted as long as I could keep my concentration for.
Anthony was just always there.
We laid in bed together one night when I asked him, “When did you first realize you were in love with me?”
“When we were at Alex’s grandmother’s house,” he told me immediately, like an instinct. “When we both slept on the hardwood floors together and I woke up and you were still sleeping. I remember looking at you and thinking about how beautiful you looked.” He paused to look at me. “That’s when I first realized I was in love with you.”
I wanted to continue off of what he said; I wanted to branch off of it. But the only words that slipped from my lips were, “I’m afraid to die.”
I could tell he didn’t know how to respond, and I wish I hadn’t said it. I wish I controlled myself.
“Anthony, listen,” I sighed, deciding that there was no better time to say this than now. “I’m dying, and it’s kind of inevitable. But you’re not. You’re here, and you’re young, and you’re on the road to being healthy. So don’t stop living your life because I stopped living mine.”
His entire body stiffened. “What?”
“You told me death was a part of life. It is, it’s natural. It happens every day. The world doesn’t stop when someone dies. And you were right. So when I’m gone, you have to stay.”
Instead of replying with a spoken word, he answered with a tight squeeze of his arms around my thinning body and a kiss to my cheek. I took that as a goodnight, and I fell asleep peacefully in his arms.
So there are two chapters left. lol.
*I don't notify, please don't ask.*
“What?”
“That hello. That hello that started everything.”
And everything that we would become and endure all started with a very simple, “Hello.”
He grinned. “Of course I remember that hello.”
“The hello that started it all,” I breathed, closing my eyes.
He laughed shortly, sitting back in his chair. “What would we do without Nurse Martin?”
As I thought of her face, I couldn’t help but smile. “We wouldn’t be here, that’s for sure.”
“And that bucket list of yours wouldn’t be completed.”
I mused this for a moment. “Can you get that for me?”
“The bucket list?”
“Yeah, and a pen.”
So he did, and he returned with the paper. It was heavily torn now.
“Why’d you need that?”
“I have to cross off number three.”
“What’s that?”
My eyes met his. “Find the thing that makes me happiest.”
* * *
I had begun to eat less and sleep more, and I would grow sleepy at random times of the day. Like, maybe at around eleven in the morning, though I’d only been awake for three hours.
Everyone seemed to understand, and wanted to help out. My mother brought me lunches and Morgan and Aidan kept me occupied with stories and they attempted games, but the games only lasted as long as I could keep my concentration for.
Anthony was just always there.
We laid in bed together one night when I asked him, “When did you first realize you were in love with me?”
“When we were at Alex’s grandmother’s house,” he told me immediately, like an instinct. “When we both slept on the hardwood floors together and I woke up and you were still sleeping. I remember looking at you and thinking about how beautiful you looked.” He paused to look at me. “That’s when I first realized I was in love with you.”
I wanted to continue off of what he said; I wanted to branch off of it. But the only words that slipped from my lips were, “I’m afraid to die.”
I could tell he didn’t know how to respond, and I wish I hadn’t said it. I wish I controlled myself.
“Anthony, listen,” I sighed, deciding that there was no better time to say this than now. “I’m dying, and it’s kind of inevitable. But you’re not. You’re here, and you’re young, and you’re on the road to being healthy. So don’t stop living your life because I stopped living mine.”
His entire body stiffened. “What?”
“You told me death was a part of life. It is, it’s natural. It happens every day. The world doesn’t stop when someone dies. And you were right. So when I’m gone, you have to stay.”
Instead of replying with a spoken word, he answered with a tight squeeze of his arms around my thinning body and a kiss to my cheek. I took that as a goodnight, and I fell asleep peacefully in his arms.
So there are two chapters left. lol.
*I don't notify, please don't ask.*
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