wittians! please help!: i like this guy. we've gone out before,

wittians! please help!:


i like this guy. we've gone out before, but we're really close still.
i think i heard him admit to liking me. i'm freaking out. i'm inexperienced when it comes to dating and i accidentally dumped him wothout realizing what i was doing...
now he thinks i'll dump him again if we go out. i catch him looking at me often in the few classes we have together. i hate admitting this. hate it. i'm a cutter......
i have a journal that i write in when my emotions are mixing around. i'm also a writer, and last night i was blowing up with ideas. i grabbed a random notebook, and wrote. unfortunately, that notebook was very important journal. i wrote my feelings in it later on that night (including those about my cutting and feelings for him). this morning, before i went to school, i quickly grabbed the journal filled with my imaginary words and ripped out the pages written on. i fear i may have ripped out the pages containing certain information, because when i went to write again tonight those specific pages are gone. id stapled all the pages together and given them to him and asked him for his opinion.
what should i do?



any advice would be helpful... please help me.