If you could see me
now
chapter 12
part one
"Merry Christmas," Hazel
said, handing me the small box wrapped in silver paper.
"Oh, you shouldn't have. I didn't get any of you
anything," I said.
"Never mind that. Open it."
Conor sat down on the sofa beside me. "Who's it
from?" I asked, smiling at him.
"All of us, but I picked it out," Conor told me.
I groaned. "I thought there would be no presents. I
didn't get anybody anything."
"We don't mind, we have plenty. You didn't get
anything," he said sternly.
I peeled the paper off the small present, revealing a maroon box
with a golden pattern around the side. Even the box was the
prettiest thing I had held in months. I opened it, revealing a
bracelet with different charms on it inside.
"Do you like it?" Conor asked.
Everyone had left us alone, creating their own conversations in
the room. "I love it. What do all the charms mean?"
"Well, the horse shoe is the horse riding lesson you are yet
to have," he told me, grinning. "The book is a
story, your story, and it's not over yet.
The circle shape is a halo, because you have lots of angels
looking out for you up in Heaven who would be upset for you to
leave this world just yet. The little diploma means that
you're going to college if it kills me, and the teddy is just
a teddy. I don't know, girls like teddy's,
right?"
"Yes, we do," I said, smiling up at him. "And this
is the most beautiful present I have ever gotten. Thank you so
much. Did those meanings come with the charms or did you make
them up?"
"I saw them in the shop and thought of a meaning for them
and added them to the bracelet. I can be pretty deep when I want
to be," he told me, a smug smile on his face.
"Thank you. I don't deserve it," I said, and it
even sounded to me like I was apoligizing.
"Stop feeling bad about being happy. Everyone wants you to
be happy." He sounded almost annoyed.
I frowned, trying to think of a way I could explain it to him
right. My life had been perfect, then it had been a nightmare,
then it had been perfect again, then another nightmare, and now
it was just okay. I'd sound mental if I explained to him that
sometimes I heard Evan clearer than I could picture him, or that
out of nowhere I'd hear Tara's life - the innocent laugh
of a baby - that I was haunted by the terrifying night with my
father, and that my mother's death was my fault. He
wouldn't understand, and I would never be able to explain it
right.
"Jodie?" Eoin called, snapping me out of my daydream.
"How much turkey do you want?"
I smiled. "Not much, thank you." Spending time with
this family of nice people must have made me a nicer person.
Sometimes I was a bit shocked when I complimented someone, or if
someone annoyed me and I said something nice in return. Had I
been like this when I was younger? I didn't remember being an
unpleasant child, and the first person I ever remembered telling
me I wasn't nice was a friend of Evan's when I was
fifteen.
I sat down between Conor and Annie while we ate. Annie babbled
about her new iPod, and how she knew what music she was going to
download, and how her friend told her she knew how to get free
music. I laughed at how clueless I was about electronics and the
internet.
"My God! You're useless! Do you even have a
Facebook?" Annie scoffed.
"No, should I have one?" I asked slowly.
"Yes! What kind of human are you?" she snapped.
"A very rare kind," I told her, and she smiled,
obviously agreeing with me.
Author's
Note:
This chater is in two parts
because it was too long and Witty wouldn't let me add it.
I'm sorry I don't update very regularly, it's hard to
do because I have exams and stuff.
Feedback? Follow for a follow. Thanks! ~Mary
:)