Friend Quote #6982956
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I can't lose my best friend

I can't lose my best friend

3 Comments

dapz95 9 years ago
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hey sunshine, what happened?
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1mrsseguin9 9 years ago
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Well I found out my best friend has been suicidal for 2 years and she just broke up with her boyfriend and was talking about killing herself :( I don't know what to do cause she won't talk to me about it (she told him if her parents had a gun she'd already be gone, then he told me). I told her I'm always here for her and how much I care about her and all she said was "thanks". We've been best friends for 5 years and she never even mentioned it to me so and now that I know she won't talk to me about it. We've been friends for so long and we usually tell each other everything but she just won't talk to me about this.
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dapz95 9 years ago
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Oh God. Well ...if this helps at all, I went through something similar recently with a good friend of mine - me being your friend in this scenario, and my friend playing you. I can't speak on behalf of her, but I know for me even though the few people who know have tried to talk to me about it, I'll just shut down every time because i don't WANT to talk about it. I can't talk about it; that's why I didn't tell anyone for about five years. Luckily for me I'm not so bad anymore, but I'm still battling my depression and sometimes it does get really hard. I don't think you should try to heal her and get her to tell you her problems and work through them with her, because you can't. You can't heal her; only she can heal herself. But I know how this must really be breaking your heart. If she hasn't told you for this long, it's not definitely because she doesn't feel she can tell you - more like you've become a distraction and a break from the darkness she's in, someone who helps her take the darkness away for a bit, and she doesn't want to lose that. Just ... I don't know; if someone had just treated me like I was a normal person who was going through some problems, instead of a ticking time bomb that needed to be saved, I would've been in a much better position. Take a deep breath, and go easy on yourself - just be there for her, and let her know you're still going to be her friend no matter what happening. Just knowing she's not alone, and she has someone who'll love her whether or not she ever gets out of this - I think that is the best bit of help you can give her. I'm still waiting for that.
She'll still the same person she always was sunshine. Don't let this knowledge of her illness define her for you. From what I can gather, you're a pretty good friend ... you don't need to do anything else apart from love her like you're already doing :)
take care of yourself. don't beat yourself up about this: if not knowing for so long is getting to you, just remember that the only way you would have been able to know is if she let you. It's not your fault.
Lots of love xxx
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2 Wittians like this

Y0UNGL0V3MURD3RMessed up little child :)*