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posted September 7, 2014 at 4:01pm UTC tagged with listen, quote

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Maturity is breaking an egg without getting any goup on your hands
When you can look yourself in the mirror and repeat "I hate myself" without looking away from your own stare....it's gone too far

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I understand that scissors can beat paper. And I get how rock can beat scissors. But there's no way paper can beat rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around rock leaving it immobie? Why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors. Why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why. Because paper can't beat anybody. A rock would tear it up in two seconds. When I play rock paper scissors. I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in their face with my already clenched fist and say oh sorry, I thought paper would protect you.
Why does toilet paper need a commercial? Who is not buying toilet paper?