How isnt it? only then will I have no memmory of you. No memmories

How isnt it? only then will I have no memmory of you. No memmories of us together. No memory of love. Only then will I no longer be miserbale without you. I dont want to live in a world where your not mine. Let alone in the smallest town in califonia. I dont want to live if its not with you but Im fighting too. How is it fair that you get ti wake up with him every morning when he doesnt deserve you? when you know its suppose to be us against the world. Hows any of that fair??