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posted February 21, 2018 at 9:53pm UTC tagged with
english, secondlanguagehumour, quote
more quotes by crimson24
related quotes
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Is this--I--a capital i or a lowercase L? You'll never know.
Now look at the word read. Now, tell me, which tense did I use it in.
Now look at the word lead. Now, tell me, did I mean the verb or the metal.
Welcome to the English language.
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One time in English class we were talking about Romeo & Juliet and I
yelled out, "SPOILER: Romeo and Juliet die!" and I sh//t you not, at least 1/3 of the class got really mad at me because they didn't know that's how it ended.
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There’s a blind boy in one of my English teacher’s classes and last week our assignment was to write poetry about nature…
this is what he turned in:
Roses are black
Violets are black
Everything is black
I can’t see.
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Once during english class my teacher told us to write a list down of bad habits we have.
We were writing for 5 minutes and the entire time these kids were whispering to eachother.
When writing time was up my teacher said,
"I'll go first. My bad habit is that sometimes when I laugh I snort by accident. Who wants to go next?"
Then one of the kids raised his hand and was picked on, he said,
"I tend to say 'and shît' at the end of what I say. I'll say that I'm watching a movie and shît. I'll say that I'm taking a test and shît. I'll say that I'm playing video games and shît."
My teacher just looked at him for a minute and said "Well okay...who's next?"
Then one of the kids next to him raised his hand and was picked on. He said,
"Usually when I'm mad I'll hit myself in the head and say 'pig tîts'. Once I spilled a carton of milk and yelled PIG TÎTS and once I fell off my skateboard and noticed I was bleeding and said 'Pig tîts.' "
My teacher just looked at him and said "Um.....okay."
Then another kid raised his hand but my teacher said "I want real answers, guys."
So then this girl in the back of my class raised her hand and was picked on. She said,
"When I sleep, I apparently yell."
And my teacher said "Finally, that was a good example."
But then the girl finished by saying,
"and once when I was sleeping I said 'FÛCK YOU NîGGA I CAN GET ANY DÎCK I WANT' "
There were a few suspensions
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