I can't remember the exact moment when my world turned black

I can't remember the exact moment when my world turned black and white. When the colour was sucked out of my soul like it was nothing and turned to vapor to disappear. It didn't happen overnight, but gradually. Every time I was let down, my heart broken again, every lie someone told me..someone I really trusted..someone I believed in, every time someone took from me what wasnt there's to take, another breath of colour escaped me..like a light turning dim. How does the universe choose us, the ones with glazed over eyes? And how does the universe choose who will always keep their light? I wanted to be like those girls who are bright, when they smile..they mean it...when they laugh..its real. No one ever hurt them, no one taught them they are small, no man took advantage..everyone in their life was always who they said they were. I want to trust. I want to believe. I want to smile. I want to be happy. I want to feel. But now all I feel is ruined..My world is Black and White. ♡