Ma, you set the standard too
low. Now whenever he smiles at me i'm at his feet. i had to
slowly set standards for myself. i became harder on others.
he's nicer to me than you ever were. it's strange. I only
got to learn this through him. Pa, he wasn't being overly
nice. He was just being himself, but i applauded his every move.
He's teaching me to have higher standards for myself and the
people around me. I can be picky with him. He doesn't get mad
like you both did. He actually listens and tries to do better by
me. Isn't that crazy? I don't always have to be the one
bending backwards. Sometimes i'm not wrong. But that's
not how it was before. These past thoughts trickle in sometimes
and i need to catch myself. The bar was so low. I didn't know
i was raised to appreciate things that were below the bare
minimum. it's almost like i deserve the same love i give. who
would have thought.