when i was a little kid, i was playing downstairs and there was a
mattress standing up against the wall. it was there for a while but
i remember when it fell on top of me. i couldnt move, i couldnt
scream, i couldnt breathe, i couldnt even hear anything. it was the
first time in my life when i learned what the panic of suffocation
felt like but then suddenly i felt comfortable and suddenly i felt
safe and just as suddenly, they pulled it off of me.
Sometimes, I sit here, staring off, into thin air. Nothing there.
Nothing on my mind. Like an empty soul..like this, is my last time
around. Like, my heart stopped beating and I died, just for a