Best Canada Quotes This Month

If countries were students
Australia: The class clown who makes everyone laugh
The United States: The jock who loves themselves and everyone secretly hates
Canada: The nice person who offers to show you around on your first day
England: The hot boy everybody wants to bang because he's a gentleman
New Zealand: Australia's little brother who is the only one who thinks Australia sucks
France: The romantic playboy who hangs around England too much
China: The overly smart kid who puts his hand up for every question
Russia: The scary large kid that nobody talks to because they'll probably get stabbed

New Zealand is basically
Australia's Canada
I always think of Canada as being the lovechild of England and France
after a drunken one night stand and England just left it to grow up with
its big brother America who was like the rebel of the family. And Canada
wanted to be exactly like America but ended up being the nicer one who
makes friends with everyone easily.




when i erase a word with a pencil,
where in the world does it go?




 

Last summer my family went to Ontario on our way to Iowa and at border
patrol the Canadian border patrol dude was being rude to my parents and kept saying these really sassy things so I muttered under my breath, "I didn't think I ordered a side of sass with my fries." and that is the story of how I got my family held up at border patrol and got part of our car searched.

Last summer I went to Iowa to visit family and me and my family drove
there. On the way there, we went through Canada. On the way back to the States, when we were going through American border patrol, the border patrol guy was like, "So where are you guys headed?" and my dad said Iowa and the border patrol dude just went, "What are you going to do in Iowa? Look at corn?" and I have never laughed harder in my life.
This is an actual radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. Radio conversation released by the chief of naval operations, 10.10.1995.

Canadians:
Please divert your course 15 defrees to the south to avoid a collision.
Americans: Reommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision.
Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.
Americans: This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.
Canadians: No, I say again, you divert YOUR course.
Americans: This is the Aircraft Carrier US LINCOLN, the second largest ship in the United States Atalantic Fleet. We are accompanied with three Destroyers, three Cruisers and numerous support vessels. I DEMAND that you change our course 15 degrees north. I say again, that's one-five degrees north, or counter measures will e undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.
Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call
I'm so bored

Because the majority of people on Witty
Live in the USA or Canada
And they're at school
And I live in London
And school hasn't started yet
And I'm so bored.

 
My mom just came back from her trip to Canada.
Do you know what she brought back for me?
A 40 mL bottle of maple syrup

Happy Canada d'eh
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