a lot of my life
has
been realizing
that i
would
cross
oceans
for
people who wouldn't
jump puddles for me
jump puddles for me
Shoutout to the kid that whispers
the answer
to you when the teacher calls on you but you weren’t paying attention
GUYS. I FIGURED OUT WHY WE ALL HAVE CAT OBSESSIONS.
We obviously have friends because we share common interests, right? Well look at this great non-biased research:
Cats: Sleeps all day, parties at night, eats, sleeps, not socialable, hides when people are near
Teenage Girls On Witty: Sleeps all day, parties at night, sleeps, not socialable, hides when people are near
I am a genius
A moment of silence for all the teenagers
whose parents won’t let them eat in their room
whose parents won’t let them eat in their room
Twinkle Twinkle Little Star
I want to hit you with my
car
Throw you off a tree so high
Hope you snap your neck and
die
♥
*Hoping it'll
thunder storm so we can't go outside for track*
friend: Please let ther be lightning, Santa.
me: What.
friend: I pray to Santa.
me: What? Why?
friend: I feel like god's got alot of other people to listen too, and there's alot 'of bad kids in the world so Santa's free.
*Couple minutes later it lightnings*
friend: Thanks Santa.
friend: Please let ther be lightning, Santa.
me: What.
friend: I pray to Santa.
me: What? Why?
friend: I feel like god's got alot of other people to listen too, and there's alot 'of bad kids in the world so Santa's free.
*Couple minutes later it lightnings*
friend: Thanks Santa.
Moral of
the story, pray to
Santa.
Apparently
my little seven year old cousin made a club
at school called the
“no friends club” and basically everyone who
doesnt have friends sits together at lunch holy sh.t hes going to be
the next leader of the free world
doesnt have friends sits together at lunch holy sh.t hes going to be
the next leader of the free world
Friend:
I hope your gravestone is in comic sans
Me: I hope you have to use algebra in your career
Friend: I hope you lose all your shoes and have to wear crocs
Me: I hope your computer crashes
Friend: I hope you step on a lego
Me: I hope the cancel Oprah
Friend: You take that back!
Me: I hope you have to use algebra in your career
Friend: I hope you lose all your shoes and have to wear crocs
Me: I hope your computer crashes
Friend: I hope you step on a lego
Me: I hope the cancel Oprah
Friend: You take that back!
Me when I get a paper cut: Ohmygosh! It
stings! I'm going to die! This is it, this is the end! Tell
my cat I love him! Goodbye friends!
Me when I get an actual serious injury: No, no, I'm fine. Seriously, it's just a scratch. Don't worry, I'll be okay.
Me when I get an actual serious injury: No, no, I'm fine. Seriously, it's just a scratch. Don't worry, I'll be okay.
