Funny Quotes

As if hanging up would make them drive any better.
Letter to my future self: Could you please write a letter to my younger self and ask it to stop writing letters to my present self?
Maybe I have fallen numb to the chirping of the birds early mornings, since I do not remember the last time they annoyed me. Rather they caused such a heavy weight to fall upon my heart, reminding me that I returned to consciousness, and was stolen from the illusion that consisted of dreams I wished my life reflected. Even the rays from the sunlight passing by the curtains and exploring my room, did not brighten my gaze, instead a long sigh escaped my mouth. I was alive. I was alive, one would say with excitement. Or rather, I am alive, correct? However, the feeling of being alive, I don't remember it, nor have I felt it in long years.
In every obstacle, there's 'tacos.'  This fact helps remind us that, even in the midst of life's struggles, it's important to take time to eat wholesome, good-tasting food.
Women wear pant suits.  Men wear dress pants.  Let's keep it that way.
He who hesitates at the lost and found is probably trying to be funny.
For any motivational quote containing the word 'flaws,' substitute 'floss,' and the resulting insight will be even more empowering.
The term is 'in-law', not 'in-fairness'.
God spelled backwards is not dog. God spelled backwards is delleps doG.
Quote of the Day:

I thought there was a tear running down my face but it was just sweat.
People You Might Like
  • tornedsoul*
  • dontsellyourselfshort
  • Bailey*
  • musicure
  • *Freedom*
  • *Yours Truly*
  • Miluiel*
Newest Wittians
  • ghostrider49
  • Zythos
  • Gavin142
  • sruff
  • alyssa0
  • LeeLee35
  • velvetcoke