Funny Quotes

me: *gets stabbed in the face.*
me: I'm fine, it's just a scratch.
me: *has sore throat.*
me: GOD LORD JESUS.
me: I AM DYING.
me: HELP ME.
You know what I really hate? When people try to sugarcoat the truth. Example: if I ask if I look bad don't give me some half hearted answer like oh you look cute. If I look bad tell me so I can fix it.  Another example: just because someone gets bullied doesn't mean the bully is always jealous of them. Sometimes you're being bullied because the bully wants attention. Sometimes you're being bullied because the bully really hates the shirt you're wearing. I mean yes about 8 times outta 10 they are jealous, but not always.  And my final example: if this shirt makes me look fat I just wanna know! Help a sister out please!😂
The one that got away. Aka the hot person you saw when with your parents.
I'm jealous of my parents I'll never have a kid at school as there's.
Reason why hate school: 5% annoying people, 5% teachers, 5% homework, and 85% it's not Hogwarts!!😤
Today I wore a lovely shade of
"I slept like crap so don't make me angry"
Wait let me grab you some tissue, your bullshit is leaking out the sides of your mouth.
Some people just need a sympathetic pat....
on the head....
with the hammer.. 🔨
Kiss me if I'm wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right?😊👌
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