Best Harrystyles Quotes Today

If Taylor and Harry were still together and I saw them:

Taylor and Harry: *making out*
Me: *gasp*
Taylor and Harry: *look at me*
Me: You're that guy from that Pepsi commercial and you're all like "and I'm Herreh!" I love that commercial!
Harry: Err, thanks.
Me: And you! You're the one that dated Joe Jonas and Lucas Till!
Taylor: *nods and smiles*
Me: And Taylor Lautner! Oh, and John Mayer and Jake Gyllenhaal!!
Taylor: *stands there awkwardly*
Me: Oh! And that guy from Glee, umm, Cory Montieth! OHH and Zac Efron! And Eddie Redmayne! 
Taylor: Uh...
Me: Oh, and I can't forget Connor Kennedy!! ...Dang, that's a lot of guys... *looks at Harry* Good luck, bro. 
Not meant to offend either swifties or directioners. just thought it was funny. Follow me and I'll follow back, duh.
*When I'm on Omegle*

Stranger: 19, male, England, looking for older women.
Me: Harry, get off Omegle.

so he calls me up and he’s like “i still love you” and i’m like “wait are you joe, taylor, lucas, john, cory, toby, jake, zac, garrett, eddie, conor, patrick, or harry?”
Niall Horan: I hate it when girls act stupid because they think it's cute. Intelligence is attractive.

Me: One particle of unobtanium has a nuclear reaction with a flux capacitor, carry the two, change it's atomic isotope into a raioactive spider. follow for a follow.
Me: Sometimes I just want to drag Harry into an empty hotel room, throw him down on a bed, straddle his thighs, rip his shirt off and MAKE HIM EXPLAIN EVERY DANG ONE OF HIS TATTOOS BECAUSE I CAN'T HANDLE THE SUSPENSE.

Harry: Well... I thought we were going somewhere else there...

follow for a follow

it's March. someone please enlighten me
as to why there's still snow on the ground.


Harry: Who has illegally downloaded this song?
Fans: *screams*

One Direction as principles scolding a student: 

Niall: Never do that again! Do you understand how ba-- *lunch bell rings* GET OUTTA THE WAY! *pushes kid over and runs to cafeteria*

Harry: So basically, erm... so... like, you can't... do that...

Zayn: You need to keep your hands and feet inside the roller coaster that is life next time, okay?

Liam: Okay, I know you made a woopsy, but be good next time. Oh my, that was so harsh! I'm sorry! You know what? Here's a lollipop. And a sticker. And a golden star sticker for you! Run along now, precious little honey bunches of oats. 

Louis: Do you even know who I am? Huh?? And you're gonna talk back to me!? Uh, not in my house, b/tch. Not in my house. 
Interviewer: Who is your favorite singer?
Niall: Justin Bieber.
Harry: Adele.
Zayn: Bruno Mars.
Liam: Bruno Mars.
Louis: Harry Styles. 
follow for a follow.
One Direction Insults:

Boys with as/es like mine don't talk to girls with faces like yours.
Harry: I care about you like Niall cares about childbirth.
Niall: I can make your girl scream louder just by clicking the follow button.
Zayn: Your face is as ugly as mine is sexy.
Liam: I know you are but what am I!!
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