Joke Quotes

knock knock!
who's there?
dishes
dishes who?
dishes sean connery


I remember 2016 like it was yesterday...


“When a sensible quote is adored a lot by many or most people on a person’s INDIVIDUAL social media account, then wondering why it feels usually as if he has either cracked a joke under the guise of a thought or others are just trying to poke fun on him through a deluge of LIKE & COMMENT vote and often both; especially more when the same post has also his own photo on it.”
~Anuj Somany
 

my aunt broke my car door. which resulted in me breaking my phone. which means I have to spend every dime I earned to fix both of those things. all because I was a good person and lent someone my car.

That moment inbetween netflix episodes when you see your reflection on the black screen and wonder what the heck you are doing with your life

 
do you think my parents will still tell me "oh, you're just not mature enough yet" in twenty years time when i'm 30, still haven't had nor want a relationship, and i tell them for the millionth time that i'm an aromantic asexual? 

Heaven's door doesn't seem so far away.

*opens fridge door*
Wanna hear a joke?

What do you call Spider-Man if he works in a tech office?










A Web Designer!
Q: WHAT DID THE BLANKET SAY WHEN IT FELL OFF THE BED?
A: "oh sheet!"
Everyone talks about finding the one that makes their heart skip a beat. Personally, I'm not looking to develop a heart problem.
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