If you are having a rough day/night, please read
on.
I know that you don't know me, and I know that I don't
know you, but if you go now, that will never change. I will never
find out what your favourite breed of cat is, and you will never
laugh over my opinion on pimples that magically appear on hamster
butts. Most importantly, I will never get to see your beautiful
face. I know what you're thinking; This girl clearly
doesn't know me, and is just trying to stop me from ending my
life because she wants followers and attention. I've heard it
all before. But that is so far from true. I am doing this because
I love you, and like many other people, I can't let you do
this. You are here to live a great and wonderful life, and trust
me; you will. Once you get through this, you will see so many
things that you can't even imagine right now. You will meet
people who will love and take care of you in every way
imaginable. Not to mention, there are so many small yet joyful
things you will never experience. Buying your first house,
meeting that special person, watching your child take their first
steps, watching the sun set/rise from a poppy field, meeting your
idol/s. The list goes on. You will never get to do any of those
things. Ever. That's not enough? Think about this. Okay,
and I need you to be honest with yourself now. Don't lie
to yourself and say 'I've never been happy,' because
I know that there has been at least one time in your life, one
time, where you have felt happy. Now think of that time. Who were
you with, what were you doing, when it was, where it was.
Well, let me tell you know, if you end it all today/tonight,
you will never get to do that again. Not to mention the people
involved will never get to see you again, and trust me, they want
to. There are literally so many people out there, right this very
moment, thinking of you, wishing the best for you, wondering what
you're doing, and if they knew that you were thinking/going
to do what you're considering doing, they would feel sick to
their stomach. Like I do, right now, thinking about how one
person, yeah, you, might not get to live another day. That's
why I need to tell you, that there is nobody as amazing as you.
Nobody on this planet can do what you can do as well as you do
it, not to mention, nobody can smile as well as you do. Speaking
of your smile, it can make someone extremely happy. Seriously.
But it won't ever be able to do that if you leave us all
today/tonight. Okay, I know how you feel, you feel like one small
action could make it all go away.That is not true. You
are loved by so many people, and you may not be
able to see, hear or feel them right now, but trust me, if they
knew what you were thinking right now, they would do everything
and anything they could to stop you. Take a few deep
breaths, put whatever it is you're trying to hurt yourself
with on the floor and avoid all eye contact with the object until
you feel that you could pick it up (to destory it or put it away,
of course) and not have the urge to harm yourself with it. Close
your eyes, keep breathing. If you're badly injured, I
need you to pick up the phone and call 000/911 right now.
If you can't do that, get somebody. I know this may
be very tough, but this is so important, and I promise you,
it will get better eventually. Call 000/911 and
keep taking those deep breaths, now explain to them what your
situation is, and remember to stay calm. If you're
not in a life threatening situation, there are still people you
can call. There are so many lifelines out there, and
trust me, the person on the other end of the line gets it. They
aren't gonna judge you, or tell you what you're doing is
disgraceful and wrong. They are going to help you through it. But
if you don't feel like you have the strength to talk, face to
face (well, over the phone) then just message me. I will check my
messages every time I log on from now on, and I will also make
sure to log on more often, because knowing that one persons life
could depend on me, as unlikely as it may be, is the most
important thing. Again, if you feel like self harming, take all
the strength inside of you that may or may not have been hidden
away all this time, and use it to put that object of great and
terrible power on the ground, far away from you, and remember,
don't look at it. Don't think about it, either, because
if you think about it, it can only get worse from there.
I love you. You are the most important thing to
me and I will never let you get hurt if I have any part in it. In
the worst case scenario, if you feel yourself losing
conciousness, and still haven't called anyone, make sure
you're on a soft surface, and try and get yourself out into
the most open space you can find (open, safe place.) so somebody
can find you. Try and calm yourself, find the nearest phone
without using too much energy and call 000/911, making sure not
to tire yourself out. Again, you are important, you
are loved, you are beautiful.