Best Period Quotes Today

 here is a list of some of the worst things ever:
- getting your period on your birthday
- getting your period at christmas
- getting your period at the start of the summer break
- getting your period when you've got something planned
- getting your period on weekends
- getting your period

i got my first period on april fools day & no one in my house believed me so i sat in my bathroom all day crying


DOES everyone’s voice…
talksuperfastwhenthingsarewrittenlikethis?
Or
in. their. head. pause. between. words. when. a. period. is. placed. between. them?
ANd IF a PERrSon tyPEs Like thls,
THey iMagINe a VOiCe going Up AnD Down?

AND WHEN THE TEXT IS ALL CAPS, YOU SAY IT A LITTLE LOUDER IN YOUR HEAD.







If I were a girl I'd probably just use my period to get away with everything

          My boss: Charlita! Why didn't you do this project when I asked you to???
          Me: I'm on my period.
          My boss: You should go home and get some rest.
          My boss: Completely paid for.
          My boss: Actually take the whole week off.
          My boss: And you know? Take my car.
          My boss: Just don't scratch it.
          My boss: Actually, go ahead and scratch it.  I don't care.
          My boss: Just leave.





It always amuses me when guys get nosebleeds. They seem so shocked
and dismayed that this could happen. I mean, blood gushing out of your body making it impossible to laugh or cough or cry without spurting sticky read liquid everywhere? That mus suck.
My sister just stormed into my room and said
"I JUST GOT MY PERIOD SO IF YOU AS MUCH AS WALK INTO THE SAME ROOM AS ME WITHIN THE NEXT 7 DAYS I AM GOING TO CUT YOUR DI.CK OFF AND FEED IT TO THE DOG"
and left.
Oh and not only does my 15 year old sister have her period today, but my 11 year old sister just got her first one today.  She came crying to me and not my mom or sister for whatever reason.  But I looked some stuff up about periods to calm her down and found some stuff out:

1) Period cramps are called Dysmenorrhea
2) Only half of people get period cramps
3) Period cramps are caused when the uterus basically suffocates itself
4) Girls are low on a hormone during their period which causes crazy chocolate cravings
5) Our old old old old ancestors used to not allow for people to see/touch a girl when she was on her period because everyone thought it was due to evil spirits taking over their body for a week.


Well enjoy.

.




haha only girls will get this am I right ladies



Ive always wondered what women do during there period in certain stories
Like do they have pads and tampons in the wizarding world
or do they cast some super absorbing spell to their underwear.

Are girls alowed to bring tampons in the Hunger Games arena
Or do they have to publicly announce they're on their period
and hope some sponsor will send a parachute
Or do they make their own out of moss?


Tell me I'm not the only one whose thought of this




 
periods
day 1: Hey, guess what? You're not pregnant! Hold on, did you hear me? 
You're NOT pregnant!
day 2: You're not pregnant! You're not pregnant! You're not pregnant! yOUU'RE NnnoTTt PreGnANTTTttt,,,!!! Ooh, let me give you some killer cramps just to make sure that you know that you're not going to be carrying any babies. And whenever you laugh, sneeze, or get up after sitting for a long time--I'll have to project my red voice again loudly that you have no need to take a pregnancy test because you know how sometimes you don't hear things! Forget that swim party you were going to go to, no way you'll be able to have fun with my constant reminders, but you just need to know you aren't pregnant! I know you'll want to eat chocolate and stay in bed all day but please just remember you are NOTtttT PregNantttTT. NOTtttT PregNantttTT. 
day 3: You're not pregnant cha cha cha cha, cha cha! You're not pregnant cha cha cha cha, cha cha! You're not pregnant cha cha cha cha, cha cha! No fetuses in your uterus this month! Did you hear me this time, do I need to scream it again? YOU ARE NOT PREGNANT! Don't expect a bump on your tummy! Did I forget to mention that you're not pregnant?
day 4: Okay, I think you get the idea now. You're putting away your pads and tampons now but I'm not quite 100% sure I got my point across. I must remind you again and scream blaringly at you when you are the most unprepared that you are NnnoTTt PreGnANTTTttt,,,!!! Sorry if I stain your clothes.
day 5: My voice is tired. I hope I screamed loud enough so you'd know you are indeed not pregnant. My next visit is undetermined, but goodbye for now!
People You Might Like
  • Steve
  • Dudu*
  • mariah_love1369
  • halfempty
  • Skimrande
  • tornedsoul*
  • DJ*
Newest Wittians
  • Lindasib
  • BobbyeriStUsh
  • Lewisuhagab
  • ThomasovCok
  • Buffka
  • cosmetictattooingbrisbane
  • Clarazkaaroca