Perv Quotes

When someone asks for your kik and gives you a compliment
Me: .....bye!
smh smh

Grammer is important! Like, capitalization is the difference from helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your uncle jack off a horse.
(You have to have a messed up mind like mine to get this)

I'm an astronaut and my next mission is to explore

Uranus.


 

Perv:I wanna bang you so hard!
Me: Me too.
Perv:Really?! I'm getting wet babe :*
Me: Yeah ,
In your face
with a chair
made out of steel
covered in spikes
dipped in poison
helled by Chuck Norris
Perv:After that then ;]
Me:WTF

Adding " in bed" to the end of any fortune cookie ffortune 
adding "in my pants" at the end of every title of a sng,tv show,movie,play,etc

The number of people I am following >

guy friend: "i wanna be.. where the strippers are. i wanna see, wanna see them dancing. opening up those,  what do you call it..? legs. up where they twerk, up where they run, up where they're up all night having fun. wondering free,, wish i could be,, part of that worrlldd"
guy friend :D


me: ...you need to work on your singing.