Twinkle Twinkle Little Star
I want to hit you with my
car
Throw you off a tree so high
Hope you snap your neck and
die
♥
In
1000
years, archeologists
will dig up tanning beds and think
we fried people as punishment.
If
I were the guy who made
the "Where's Waldo"
books, I would have totally made a page where Waldo wasn't
there.
"If there are any idiots in the room,
please stand up," said the sarcastic
teacher. After a long silence, one student rose to his feet.
"Now then, why do you consider yourself an idiot?"
enquired the teacher with a sneer. "Well, actually I
don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you
standing up there all by yourself."
Me: *Reading a book*
Person: What are you reading?
Me: *holds up book while continuing to read*
Person: Oh yeah, I read that book! Did you get to the part where ________ dies?
Me: WHAT THE F*CK HAVE YOU DONE
When butterflies fall in love
Do they feel people in their stomachs?
Tumblr: The creative computer genius/blogger who everyone is jealous of. Most people copy her work.
Twitter and Facebook: Brother and sister, they are the drama king and queen of the school. They will tell anyone who will listen about whatever is going on in their lives. They are known for announcing their statuses at the top of their lungs. They are addicted to their iPhones.
Youtube: A movie making expert who is famous throughout the school. This tech-geek is well-liked and his movies have gone viral.
MySpace: The lonely girl who sits in the back of the class. She knows what it's like to be popular, but unfortunately, she has been long forgotten. No one really knows why she's even there anymore...
Witty: The group of mentally crazy teenage girls. They sit on top of desks in the back of the room in messed-up messy buns, and sweatpants eating jars of Nutella and watching cat videos on their phones and telling jokes before laughing like donkeys and falling off of desks. To escape the awkward moment, they joke slowly out the door (jogging for 27 seconds before becoming too tired) to be married to One Direction and Ed Sheeran. Sadly, they both decline their requests for marriage, and they socially awkward Wittians stumble away to the animal shelter to buy as many cats as they like before flying into the grocery store to buy more Nutella. They want to buy clothing too, however they walk away in shame after seeing the price tags on the items.
Looks like Billy Ray put
too much loco in Miley's hot cocoa
Me: *misses TV episode*
Episode: *never played again*
Me: *watches TV episode*
Episode: *played 1000 times*
Perks of
not
having a
thigh gap:
When food falls in your lap, you
can actually catch it.
