Best Religion Quotes This Year

I have a friend and her mom forced her to go to church against her will.
When the holy water at the church touched her skin, she screamed "It burns." Long story short, she isn't allowed back in that church anymore.
What I've learned from the Internet: Self defense techniques, art appreciation, dealing with basic life situations, politics, the economy, biology facts, to be open-minded and accepting of everyone (no matter the shape, form, gender, race, sexuality, religion, social status) the difference between gray and grey, the effect one simple, little word can have on people both good and bad, how to deal with depression, anxiety, and suicidal feelings, some of the theories of our existence, why the plague didn't effect Poland, what to do if I get buried alive, etc.
What I've learned in school: How to use a calculator to find the side of a triangle
Screw God.
I've grown up believing and worshipping a god faker than barbie. If there was a god, why the hell didn't he help me? Why did you just let us all fall into this horrible darkness? I thought you were supposed to love us. Help us. Guide us. If there is a god he's not who we think he is. He's a vantriloquist, a puppet master, and we're all just the sad pathetic dolls he uses for amusement. 
I'm sorry, you two can't get married. The Bible said Adam and Eve, not
Matthew and Ashley. Come back when you have legally changed your names.
To you, they're just band;
to me, they're my heroes.

To you, it's just a poem;
to me, it's a masterpiece.

To you, they're just words;
to me, they're a weapon, a tool.

To you, it's just music;
to me, it's a religion.

To you, it's just a book;
to me, it's an old friend.

To you, it means nothing;
to me, it means everything.

Shout out to all the religious kids who keep their beliefs to themselves
in the middle of science class. But also, shout out to all the athiests who don't sh.t on everyone else's beliefs "because of science".

God spent a long time crafting you,
and God doesn't make worthless things.

IS THE SATAN REALLY THE

BAD GUY HERE?

 
Actually, the devil gave Humans critical thinking, which God didn't want.
He wanted us not to eat from the tree of knowledge or whatever so we could basically be thought-slaves for eternity, but the devil turned the tables there with a single conversation.
Also, the devil killed about 10 people in the Bible, where God killed about 2.3 million.
He understands human nature but doesn't judge you for being human.
He accepts God's unwanted children unconditionally.
And still he's a
1dickhead? why? because he can take it.
Because he's not our hero, he's our silent guardian. A watchful protector.



A dark knight.
"Why is my language not clear to you? Because you are unable to hear what I say." --John 8:34
Wait. Did Jesus say the equivalent of "Did I stutter?" Jesus is so sassy.

If you have suffered a tragedy and someone says, "You're in my prayers."
with sincerity, and you reply with some egotistical sh.t about being atheist, you are an emotionally inept moron. For real, though. Like, think about it. If someone is religious, there's really no kinder sentiment they can express than appealing to the highest power they know for your recovery. Whether or not you think it "works" is irrelevent--the kindness is absolutely real.
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