I was in the winter of my life, and the men I met along the
road were my only summer. At night I fell asleep with visions
of myself, dancing and laughing and crying with them. Three
years down the line of being on an endless world tour, and my
memories of them were the only things that sustained me, and
my only real happy times. I was a singer - not a very popular
one, I once had dreams of becoming a beautiful poet, but upon
an unfortunate series of events saw those dreams dashed and
divided like a million stars in the night sky that I wished
on over and over again, sparkling and broken. But I
didn't really mind because I knew that it takes getting
everything you ever wanted, and then losing it to know what
true freedom is. When the people I used to know found out
what I had been doing, how I'd been living, they asked me
why - but there's no use in talking to people who have
home. They have no idea what it's like to seek safety in
other people - for home to be wherever you lay your head. I
was always an unusual girl. My mother told me I had a
chameleon soul, no moral compass pointing due north, no fixed
personality; just an inner indecisiveness that was as wide
and as wavering as the ocean... And if I said I didn't
plan for it to turn out this way I'd be lying... Because
I was born to be the other woman. Who belonged to no one, who
belonged to everyone. Who had nothing, who wanted everything,
with a fire for every experience and an obsession for freedom
that terrified me to the point that I couldn't even talk
about it, and pushed me to a nomadic point of madness that
both dazzled and dizzied me.
Every night I used to pray that I’d find my people, and
finally I did on the open road. We had nothing to lose,
nothing to gain, nothing we desired anymore, except to make
our lives into a work of art. Live fast. Die young. Be wild.
And have fun. I believe in the country America used to be. I
believe in the person I want to become. I believe in the
freedom of the open road. And my motto is the same as ever:
"I believe in the kindness of strangers. And when
I’m at war with myself I ride, I just ride." Who
are you? Are you in touch with all of your darkest fantasies?
Have you created a life for yourself where you can experience
them? I have. I am crazy.
but i am free.
- Lana Del Rey; Ride