After all I am going through, I am still
proud to say I have been clean for 4 months.
yay!
Brittle bitter sweet
My mouth it does not eat
My exoskeleton
My darkening undone
Silky silhouette
My kilojewels of debt
With Ana's gentle sigh
I consent myself to die
My mouth it does not eat
My exoskeleton
My darkening undone
Silky silhouette
My kilojewels of debt
With Ana's gentle sigh
I consent myself to die
Ignite a flame so pure
True perfection is the cure
From my temples to my jaw
My scars they hide no more
Oh, sculture with no name
Please decorate my frame
My jagged spinal chain
My artist of disdain
The beauty that I see in stick and stones and bones
My supernatural fortitude resignating when I'm alone
Averty your eyes from me
A ghostly memory
The lights are on but no one's home my sticks and stones and bones
True perfection is the cure
From my temples to my jaw
My scars they hide no more
Oh, sculture with no name
Please decorate my frame
My jagged spinal chain
My artist of disdain
The beauty that I see in stick and stones and bones
My supernatural fortitude resignating when I'm alone
Averty your eyes from me
A ghostly memory
The lights are on but no one's home my sticks and stones and bones
And suddenly, she understood why all those writers were so sad, and
why all those poets spoke in slow metaphors. She understood why the
sky got dark when it rained and why thunder came before lightning.
She understood why fire burned the brightest only after it was
kindled properly and not carelessly and quick. She understood what
it meant to feel nothing but see everything. She understood why
people planted flowers on graves even though the people they plant
them for will never see them. And finally, she understood why the
white ground and dark sky of winter felt better than the green
grass and vibrant blue sky of summer.
I was. But then I realized I was holding onto something that
didn’t exist anymore. That the person I missed didn’t
exist anymore. People change. The things we like and dislike
change. And we can wish they wouldn’t all day long, but that
never works
If you hurt yourself, it doesn’t matter how bad it is.
It’s not a competition. The point is that you felt bad enough
to cause harm to your body or to consider it. You deserve support
with that. No problem is too small, honestly.
I usually feel all panicky and sad and sometimes i wake up in the
middle of the night and start crying. After a few days of this i
will pick up glass and do something i regret and then i feel empty
and no longer care and i try to distract myself with the
things i like and that works for a bit until the cycle starts again
Cut my wrist and hope to die stick a knife through my chest and a
bullet to my head cause then maybe I won't be insane
-Sometimes I think
-Sometimes I think
Its 2 am
It's 2 am and I'm alone in my room crying. You're the only one who knows. You stayed up for hours to help me.
It's 6:30 am and I text you a good morning text about the beautiful sunrise and you say I'm adorable.
It's 7:45 the same day and I'm waiting impatently for you to show up and brighten the mood.
It's 4:20 and we're at the movies. You keep making dirty jokes to keep me from crying.
It's 12:35 and we're at lunch. I worked for hours on your birthday presents and just after I give them to you a girl shows up calling herself your girlfriend.
It's 2 am a month later and I'm alone in my room crying. No one knows. I've stayed up for hours deciding where the first cut would go.
It's 2 am and I'm alone in my room crying. You're the only one who knows. You stayed up for hours to help me.
It's 6:30 am and I text you a good morning text about the beautiful sunrise and you say I'm adorable.
It's 7:45 the same day and I'm waiting impatently for you to show up and brighten the mood.
It's 4:20 and we're at the movies. You keep making dirty jokes to keep me from crying.
It's 12:35 and we're at lunch. I worked for hours on your birthday presents and just after I give them to you a girl shows up calling herself your girlfriend.
It's 2 am a month later and I'm alone in my room crying. No one knows. I've stayed up for hours deciding where the first cut would go.
Stop romanticizing things that
hurt
i will continuesly bring that knife to my wrist or my hip or my leg. that mean thing you said at school that you thought was hilarious isn't funny. that time you pushed me down infront of everyone just to get a cheap laugh wasn't worth it. you think i'm doing it just so people will notice me, you think i am doing it for attention, you think i want people to feel sympathy for me, you think i want people to feel sorry for me and ask me if i'm ok. looks like im the first to tell you that there are better ways to get attention. -anonomously
i will continuesly bring that knife to my wrist or my hip or my leg. that mean thing you said at school that you thought was hilarious isn't funny. that time you pushed me down infront of everyone just to get a cheap laugh wasn't worth it. you think i'm doing it just so people will notice me, you think i am doing it for attention, you think i want people to feel sympathy for me, you think i want people to feel sorry for me and ask me if i'm ok. looks like im the first to tell you that there are better ways to get attention. -anonomously
