'Maybe
"okay"
will be our
always'
. . .
mentally unstable:
adjective
lifestyle choice. Definition: Thanks, bands.
lifestyle choice. Definition: Thanks, bands.
THE LIGHT IN THE
FOREST
He was beautiful. I’m not going to lie, or
deny the truth that was in front of my eyes. He was
absolutely gorgeous, and underneath the mask, he was so much
more. At first I didn’t feel like it was necessary for
me to see what he looked like. How he carried himself was
enough for me, and how he cared about me despite me being a
complete stranger was completely enough.
But when he lifted the mask, his fingertips gently picking it up by the chin, it was safe to say that even underneath it he was utterly perfect.
I will never forget those eyes. They were practically translucent and every time I settled on a shade of color, I would change my mind. They were green and blue and gold and gray—and eventually, I gave up, and just decided they were nothing but clear.
He also had this way of staring at me. At first, when I was young, it made me uncomfortable. He would stare for the longest time and never say a word. But I had gotten used to it, even if he did stare with the mask on. Those black painted eyes on the mask would just look at me, but it never shook my soul.
I think what I loved the most though, was that despite our predicament, he never lost hope. We never lost hope. Many would’ve giving up long ago, finding not being able to touch their lover even once impossible. But we made it work—even though I itched to put my hand in his, or his desire to touch my cheek burned so severely, we made it work.
Summer after summer, when I was with him, I felt so alive. He was the only reason I looked forward to summer every single year.
But through winter, spring, and fall, when I wasn’t with him, I was dead. I dreamt constantly of going back to the mountains during the warm weather to see him.
And then there was that one summer. We went to the spirit festival in the mountains. A cloth was tied to each of our wrists so he wouldn’t lose me in the crowd. I thought of the cloth as sort of our ‘bond’, to be honest with you.
Well, that was the summer he grabbed a human boy by the arm. He didn’t know the boy was human; I surely didn’t know either. But when his fingertips and soon his fingers and soon his entire hand started to disappear into blue, shimmering shards of light, we both knew.
He watched his hand disintegrate into those pieces of shining light and then outstretched his arms. He turned to me with a smile on his face, and not one of those coy smirks I was so used to, but a genuine smile.
“Come Hotaru, I can finally touch you.”
And I ran into his arms, holding his quickly dissipating body in my own, burying my face into his chest. I closed my eyes and held on so tightly. He was warm and as he wrapped his arms around me, I swore it grew even warmer.
The warmth faded as quickly as it came and within mere seconds, I was crumpled on the ground, hugging only his clothing. It was all that was left of him, aside from the mask he had given me that night before he made his fatal mistake.
“I love you.” I heard the last of his voice confess to me.
I sobbed into his clothes.
“Yeah, I love you too.”
But when he lifted the mask, his fingertips gently picking it up by the chin, it was safe to say that even underneath it he was utterly perfect.
I will never forget those eyes. They were practically translucent and every time I settled on a shade of color, I would change my mind. They were green and blue and gold and gray—and eventually, I gave up, and just decided they were nothing but clear.
He also had this way of staring at me. At first, when I was young, it made me uncomfortable. He would stare for the longest time and never say a word. But I had gotten used to it, even if he did stare with the mask on. Those black painted eyes on the mask would just look at me, but it never shook my soul.
I think what I loved the most though, was that despite our predicament, he never lost hope. We never lost hope. Many would’ve giving up long ago, finding not being able to touch their lover even once impossible. But we made it work—even though I itched to put my hand in his, or his desire to touch my cheek burned so severely, we made it work.
Summer after summer, when I was with him, I felt so alive. He was the only reason I looked forward to summer every single year.
But through winter, spring, and fall, when I wasn’t with him, I was dead. I dreamt constantly of going back to the mountains during the warm weather to see him.
And then there was that one summer. We went to the spirit festival in the mountains. A cloth was tied to each of our wrists so he wouldn’t lose me in the crowd. I thought of the cloth as sort of our ‘bond’, to be honest with you.
Well, that was the summer he grabbed a human boy by the arm. He didn’t know the boy was human; I surely didn’t know either. But when his fingertips and soon his fingers and soon his entire hand started to disappear into blue, shimmering shards of light, we both knew.
He watched his hand disintegrate into those pieces of shining light and then outstretched his arms. He turned to me with a smile on his face, and not one of those coy smirks I was so used to, but a genuine smile.
“Come Hotaru, I can finally touch you.”
And I ran into his arms, holding his quickly dissipating body in my own, burying my face into his chest. I closed my eyes and held on so tightly. He was warm and as he wrapped his arms around me, I swore it grew even warmer.
The warmth faded as quickly as it came and within mere seconds, I was crumpled on the ground, hugging only his clothing. It was all that was left of him, aside from the mask he had given me that night before he made his fatal mistake.
“I love you.” I heard the last of his voice confess to me.
I sobbed into his clothes.
“Yeah, I love you too.”
I used to not wear makeup.
I used to not straighten my hair.
I used to not care about my weight.
I used to not care what anyone thought.
I used to think boys were gross.
I used to go months without crying.
I used to love to go to school.
I used to be happy all the time.
What
happened?
Ya know
I've tried this
"crying in the shower" thing
It doesn't work!
The acoustics are horrible
leaving everyone aroun to hear
sure your eyes aren't red
but everyone still knows
I've tried this
"crying in the shower" thing
It doesn't work!
The acoustics are horrible
leaving everyone aroun to hear
sure your eyes aren't red
but everyone still knows
"...if people were rain, I was drizzle and she was hurricane.”
my cat is sad,
no one else in his family is a cat
we are all human except for him
he is excluded from most things
and no one tells him why
he just wants to play
and be loved
he looks at us with wonder
and disappointment
he says hello i am a cat what is my existence
what is that / why it and not me / please can you look at me and love me too
can i have some of your food please im sorry i dont like my food so much
do you want to play with my toys? this one is my favorite
do you like me
are we brothers
why didnt i grow up
why am i so small
can you help me be happy
where are you going
no one else in his family is a cat
we are all human except for him
he is excluded from most things
and no one tells him why
he just wants to play
and be loved
he looks at us with wonder
and disappointment
he says hello i am a cat what is my existence
what is that / why it and not me / please can you look at me and love me too
can i have some of your food please im sorry i dont like my food so much
do you want to play with my toys? this one is my favorite
do you like me
are we brothers
why didnt i grow up
why am i so small
can you help me be happy
where are you going
