Story Quotes

nicholas james gardner i will love you till the end of time.
theres never a day where i dont think about you
if i were able to change one thing in my whole life it would be that mistake
nothing else, even the hell i went through when i was younger 
because you made it better and now i have nothing
no one who will make me feel special
who can tell me im beautful and ill believe it
who i can plan my future with....
i want you
i wanna yell at u for the other day
you made me think i had the one thing that made me excited to wake
that made me happy
that made me laugh
that made me smile
you made me think i had that back
bc u asked me out again
and i even asked if you were ready
and you, YOU said YES....
but then wen we called you said it was 50% in the moment
that was, that felt like a bullet to the chest....
and i forgive you because you didnt do really anything wrong....
but like a line in cinderella : i always wind up wishing and dreaming i dont suppose that does any good at all"
im wish and dreaming for you to come back but why would you?
its me?
why would you even think about it?
im horrible in my eyes
but when we were together in my eyes you made me feel good.
you didnt make me feel like a princess,
oh but you made me feel like a queen......
and i will try my best to return the same, i wanna make u feel like ur king
that ur not waiting to find a princess, but you had already had your queen.........
which i would have hoped to be me
but who was i kidding.....
ur to amazing, cute,funny, and smart for me....
ilysm nicholas james gardner.............
i hope you'll get together with me again but this time just not in the moment...

he wouldnt want me to feel this way..........................
but i cant help it when im without him......
tbh me, but because of me i feel this......
~What I wish I could say to you~
I f*cking love you. I f*cking love you. You already know I f*cking love you! I wish I could tell you. I honestly wish it was okay to tell you. I didn't want to have to move on. But after what happened 3 months was 3 months ago...and 3 months of still loving you, regardless what you did. Well, there's still a part of me that hates you. Hating you for doing what you did. Hating you for seeing what I had to see you demonstrate to your friends. She doesnt give a damn about me. I know she doesnt, thats why I didnt bother with her anymore. And Z, I can't apologize for not seeing him the way he saw me, I was too distracted by you. I was still in love with you and I sometimes really hate myself for that. I knew we weren't going to happen again, so I had to move on. Truth be told, I didn't. As you already know, my trust issues are worse. What he and I are now...he's super sweet. he is. I dont deserve him, and if I did, I just f*cking want you. I know, it's only been 4 days, but I can't just let you go. I have to, I know. And this is so wrong of me for even typing this. I still don't want you to move on...but that wouldnt be fair. Some part of me does hope he and I dont work out. I want *us* again. My friends.. they're accepting. They f*cking hate you for what you did to me, but they've always known how much i've wanted you. All of the times i've cried over you? Those tears were just because I f*cking wanted you back. You weren't popping the question at all, and because of that...I knew I was just hurting myself even more. Not to mention, as much as I want to believe you, I believe the ones that did me wrong more, that you were using me. That you never cared. But you telling me to tell you first if he were to f*ck up, that made me want to cry more and just hug you and everything else...that is not okay. 😭 I just...He and I are just giving this a shot. I'm still not okay... but I couldn't close off completely...I'm sorry...I....I still love you... I did then...and I still do, now.
~I truly don't know what you want me to do. You're no good for me, but I still f*cking love you. He's too good for me, I don't deserve him.~
~I really thought it was easy to just leave. I really thought it was easy to just stop. I really thought it was easy to quit loving you. i really thought it was easy.~
~~The fact that I am new to this information and positive treatment is kind of sad to realize how I am not used to this...because i've never been treated this way before~~
~Quit it, you're making me blush. You're too kind and sweet. Ugh, you're my favorite candy! I can't get enough of you.~
~Pretty and cute doesnt save everything~
Only us 
💙~\ 04-17-18 /~💚
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