Story Quotes

in this awkward silence,
i'm looking at you.
you're looking at me.
you didn't ask for much but
even this is difficult for me.
i am incapable and lacking.
any expectation is too high.
to myself and you, i am sorry.
those delicate words that felt like butterflies in your tummy,
i confess, for me they were a very heavy, very burdensome weight on my mind.
and i have been trying to pick up the pieces but you keep holding onto one. holding it above my head as if it's a game. when i'm couragous you hold tightly onto that piece. you outstretch your arm, as far as you can go. it's silly, it's too far. you only know it hurts when my tears fall. when i've given in to cowardice and accepted your embrace. when i can't hold my emotions back any longer. it's only then when you give it back to me. you only let me be whole when you're holding me. how did i get here? miscommunication and emotional unavailability. you are the embodiment of my nightmares. you stand tall before me with a smile. do you see what's happening? i'm in the palm of your hand and you're so happy. you're always so happy when you see me. you truly don't know my heart. 
If you think happy thoughts, they will shine through your face like sunbeams & you will always look lovely🌻🌻🌻
This is incrdible to me. The last post I had on this site was from 1,922 days ago. This is my first login in since then. And absolutely nothing has changed.  
Sucks to be so understanding but never understood ..
When you feel your soul drop to the floor
Like a hole, like an open bleeding sore
Then you'll have bled like I bled
And you'll have wept as I've wept
β€’β„β€˜π“‚ π’Ώπ“Šπ“ˆπ“‰ 𝒢 π‘”π“Žπ“…π“ˆπ“Ž π“Œπ’Ύπ“‰π’½ π“Œπ’Άπ“ƒπ’Ήπ‘’π“‡π’Ύπ“ƒπ‘” π‘’π“Žπ‘’π“ˆ β€’β„β€˜π“π“ 𝓉𝑒𝓁𝓁 π“Žπ‘œπ“Š π“ˆπ‘’π’Έπ“‡π‘’π“‰π“ˆ 𝓉𝒽𝒢𝓉 π“ˆπ‘’π“ƒπ’Ή π“Žπ‘œπ“Š π“‰π‘œ π“ˆπ“π‘’π‘’π“… β€’π’œπ“π“ ℐ 𝒸𝒢𝓃 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒 π“Žπ‘œπ“Š π’Ύπ“ˆ 𝒢𝓁𝓁 π‘œπ’» π“‚π“Ž π“π‘œπ“‹π‘’ β€’π’―π’½π‘’π“ˆπ‘’ 𝒢𝓇𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒 π“‰π’½π’Ύπ“ƒπ‘”π“ˆ ℐ 𝒸𝒢𝓃 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒 π“Žπ‘œπ“Š π“‰π‘œ 𝓀𝑒𝑒𝓅
You're not my man. Likewise, i am not your woman. I want to have you but i don't have it in me. I'll let you hold my hand again tonight. It's not because it's you. It is because I am selfish and lonely tonight. Those words of comfort I gave you...I think I might need them. That hug, that soothing. Those empty, decorated compliments; I think I need them too. Reassurance that I'm a good person, that I have a heart. Can you please tell me those things? When morning comes you'll have to let me go and pretend nothing has changed. Don't call or get too concerned, but honey, I think I've hit a wall tonight. I can't fix this on my own. I'm not sure how I'm going to keep this show running. I'm so sick of playing myself and coming back to you. You're not mine and i'm not yours. I keep telling you. It is not because it is you, it is simply because.
i feel like my whole life i have been running forward without looking back. at some point a few years ago i slowed down and just stopped. i slowly started walking again but i can never get to that momentum back again. i want to find that place again. blind faith keeping me charging forward. i don't want to question anything anymore. i want the bliss of not knowing anything else. i want to put the blinders back on.
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