Thanksdad Quotes

Has anyone else ever been so scared they started crying?
"Idiots are not very smart."
- My Father
"when you wish on a star, you're actually a few million years too late. that star is dead. just like your dreams" thank you dad
My dad just told me I'm getting fat.
Sister: "Hey did it hurt when-"

Me: "I fell from heaven? Yes, yes it did."

Dad: "What'd you land on?"

Me: "Must have been something pretty bad to end up with a face like this."

He just laughed.


despite and our disputes

and the times where i've sworn i hated you
you've done a pretty good job
at raising someone not too embarrassing
✿ thanks dad 


                                    "haha i fuc.ked ur mom last nite"
                                     "shut up dad"
                                   



Me: I'm having breathing problems again
Dad: Well then don't breathe
Me: Thanks, dad


 
Me:I'm ugly
Dad: No
Me: So I'm pretty?
Dad: I didn't say that
yoloooooo
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