Best Unicorns Quotes This Week



"My cousin is six.

I was talking to him the other day and I said

'What do you want to be when you're older?'

He looked at me and went 'A unicorn.'

And I was like 'Why is that?'

'So I can stab people with my head.'"



 

Dear Noah,
I could have sworn you
said the ark wasn't
leaving until six.
Sincerely,
The Unicorns




Good men are like unicorns.


Everyone talks about them , but nobody has actually seen them.
 


i dont understand how i can get so much joy from covering my pets with blankets and watching the lump move around
plot twist: rainbows poop unicorns
 
Ugly girls are like unicorns... THEY DON'T EXIST.

unless of course someone has a pet unicorn they would like to tell me about.....
I don't simply run the mile, I am a unicorn, therefore I must 'prance' the mile.
popular girl: Ughh, the 2 things I hate most. Unicorns and black
me:YO MOTHERF.UCKER I'VE BUILT AN EMPIRE ON THIS TWO THINGS AND I GIVE A CRAP TO YOUR OPINION
 

words do hurt

Chapter 8

The rest of the day wasn't any better.
Everywhere I went, Tiffany & Maria would be laughing and having a great time, while I was sulking in my own misery that was growing each minute of each hour.
I kicked the large piles of snow in my path as I reluctantly trudged home, since I wasn't going to get a ride from Maria anytime soon.
I heard a blaring honk come from behind me, as I felt the hard impact of a rather large snowball hit my back, as I heard the loud laughs.
I soon learned that it was one of the girls from my school, with Tiffany in the front passenger seat, smirking at me with pleasure.
"How was school?" my mother asked kindly, coming from the kitchen with a Hello Kitty apron on and with a bit of cake batter smeared across her cheek.
"Everything was peachy perfect." I gritted through my teeth, taking my jacket off.
"I know sarcasm when I hear it. What's up?" my mother glared with a raised eyebrow, sitting on the couch, signalling me to join us.
"Nothing is up! I'm fine, now stop interrogating me with all these questions!" I spat, running upstairs.
I felt guilt just yelling at her, but I just wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone.
I just wanted to lock myself in my room and just chill.
I decided to go on Facebook and put on a status, just because I was feeling so bottled up, and it seemed like the only thing to let my frustration out.
Today was horrible. But tomorrow's a brand new day, I guess. I typed as I officially pressed post as it immediately showed up onto my newsfeed.
I didn't get 50+ likes on my statuses or pictures, but at least I got 5 or 10.
A couple of seconds later, I got a notification that Tiffany had commented on my status.
Suck it up, it's not anybody's fault that your ex best friend was tired of you and moved on. Attention seeker. Go write about your feelings in your diary.
I was about to reply, but a flood of more comments appeared on it.
Yeah, get a life, loser.
Lol, who is this chick anyways?
She's not even that pretty, why would she have friends in the first place?
I've seen her around school, what a loner!
I hope she drops out of school.

I panted heavily at all this; I didn't even know most of these people.
I presume that Tiffany got all her little followers to attack me, and you bet her plan was worling.
I could sense the panging touch in my chest, and I didn't like that feeling one bit.
Just as I was about to push my laptop away, there was one more comment.
From Maria.
Omg, I just realized that I used to be her friend! Was I on something or what? She's a F R E A K.
Her words wounded me the most; I can't believe she would say that about me!
That was all it took to make me grab a swiss army knife out of a toolbox from the garage to make a few, painful slices on my wrists.
Little did they know that it was a dreadful feeling.


Favorite if you liked/read it & Comment what you think!


UNITATO
half unicorn, half potato


 
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