Sometimes, when
I'm taking a shower, I lean forward and let my hair
dramatically fall in front of my face and pretend I just had some kind of heart shattering moment in the rain. And, other times, I collect water in my mouth and spit it at things like squirtle.
dramatically fall in front of my face and pretend I just had some kind of heart shattering moment in the rain. And, other times, I collect water in my mouth and spit it at things like squirtle.
Hipsters: I'm not a hipster, but I can make
your hips stir!
Me: I'm not water, but I'll f//cking drown you
Me: I'm not water, but I'll f//cking drown you
drinking lots of
water
expectation: clear skin, fit, healthy, shiny hair
reality: waking up in the middle of the night like fifty thousand times needing to pee
Me: Why
does water cost more than soda?
Me: Why does salad cost more than a hamburger?
Me: Why does fruit cost more than candy?
Me: Why do vegetables cost more than chips?
Me: Why do workout clothes cost more than cute shirts?
Me: Why do sports bras cost more than regular bras?
Me: Why does spandex cost more than jean shorts?
Me: Why?
Me: Why does salad cost more than a hamburger?
Me: Why does fruit cost more than candy?
Me: Why do vegetables cost more than chips?
Me: Why do workout clothes cost more than cute shirts?
Me: Why do sports bras cost more than regular bras?
Me: Why does spandex cost more than jean shorts?
Me: Why?
Do you ever
choke on water and feel like
natural selection is trying to tell you something?
natural selection is trying to tell you something?
When I found out my toaster wasn't water proof,
I was shocked.
If
humans are like 70% water
and we drink water, does that make
us cannibals?
Do you really need water to feel like you are drowning?
