Newest Quotes

 Having a favorite person is a literal death sentence.

2 people in 4 days. today is supposed to be happy. we just miss people instead.
i remember how i felt.
sore and out of place.
awkward and uncomfortable.
it was like a hot beam spotlight moment
yet also like i was in the background and didn't matter.

i remember how it felt.
younger me consoling myself.
telling myself it would be over soon.
promising myself i would never put myself in a similar situation ever again.

biting my lip just hurt me.
sweeping things under the rug just made me feel dirty.
keeping the peace always left me hurt.

keep your promise.
prioritise me.


i'm not sure what i'll do
i might regret it
but i'm growing old.
i can't dread the days i'm supposed to enjoy.
time with family is supposed to be
something i look forward to

i can't keep dreading the days
i'm supposed to enjoy.

Don’t cut a cake! Awake! Your Birthday is Fake!

Do you cut your birthday cake?
Do you know your birthday is fake?
Don't continue to make the mistake
It's time for you to now awake!
Ask your mother when you were born
You were kicking weeks before and this went on and on
You were alive long back, she knows
And even science has pictures as the embryo grows
Nine months before your so-called date of birth
That is when you actually came to earth
Then you didn't have blood, bone, and skin
You were just a Power, the spark within
But because you believed in the birthday lie
You believed that there were ghosts and fairies in the sky!
Every year you continue to cut your birthday cake
You don't realize the truth, just believe what is fake!
When will you, to the truth, awake?
When will you stop baking your birthday cake?
When you realize that nine months earlier you were born
Then to stop cutting the cake, will you undertake?
Although you know that it is not your date of birth
You came forty weeks before as the zygote on earth
But you just choose to follow the herd
You don't investigate, don't fly like a bird
You don't ask the question, 'Who am I?'
If the body came later, then, 'I am the body,' is a lie
I was that Energy Spark that first came to earth
Not on my so-called birthday is my real birth
In what way will this news make us awake?
Why this big fuss about the birthday cake?
When we realize we are not the body or the mind
Then, Self-Realization we will find
If you are not the body that developed on earth
You realize you are that spark, that's your real worth!
That spark is Energy, that spark is the Soul
To realize this is our life’s ultimate goal
After the spark, starts as a little zygote
Our body is created, be it man or goat
We are not the bodies that we seem to wear
The bodies will live and die and tear
One day, every ‘body’ must die
The one who was alive will depart into the sky
The body that is made of skin and bone
Returns to ashes, as people mourn
We are not that body that died, were we?
People say, 'He passed away', and we are free
They are so sure in the body we no more live
To the flames or to the coffin, our body they give!
If we are not the body that will one day surely die
If we were not born on our birthday, that is a lie!
If we are that spark conceived nine months before birth
Then who is it that on death leaves the earth?
The Soul, the Divine Spirit, the Atman is that spark
To give us life from birth to death is its task
It arrives at conception and departs at death
We are that Power that gives us breath
When you do a simple thing like stop cutting a cake
When you investigate and realize that your birthday is fake
You realize you are the Soul, you are no more vague
To the ultimate truth, you will awake
This Realization is the real beginning of the journey called life
It will liberate us from all misery and strife
When we realize we are not body, ego, and mind
Eternal Happiness and Peace, we will find
Just because we were taught many things that were lies
We believe that God lives in the skies
The birthday cake will make us realize
We will live as the Soul, we will be wise
So, from now don't cut your birthday cake
Don't continue to be ignorant for God's sake
Realize that your birthday is fake
You are the Divine Soul, to this truth awake

 What you don't realize is just how badly I've split. I've never felt more alone and isolated from all those I hold dear whilst they move on through life without me just fine.

I created this account when I was 13. I used it until I was 15. It was an outlet for me that I really needed through middle school to beginning highschool. 
After a sleepless night of thinking about my past, I remembered this website. Surprisingly enough, I still knew my login. I wanted to post something for younger's an update to young Lexie:

You are now 25.
You have had many first kisses. 
Music has always been and still is your favorite thing. 
One Direction broke up years ago. 
You have several tatoos now.
You've seen My Chemical Romance in concert.
You made it to New York City.
Do I deserve your kindness ?
It feels new.

            Papa is only human.
               he has been many things.
               my umberella, my cheerleader,
               my anger, my embarassment, my regret, 
               my first best friend  and my favourite.
                  but above all else
                            he is only human.
It's called the vitreous humor, not the vitreous gravitas.
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