Newest Quotes

02:45am 
I miss tea time 
9pm will always 
remind me of her. 
i'm sorry mel. 

02:43am 
i feel lost and i want 
a giant redo. 
can i go back to spring
when you wanted
to leave me for chris.  
i would let you now. 

02:31 
I should sleep 
I should run 
...
I'm not okay 

02:28am 
Alex would say something to calm me down 
no one will know me like he did. 
Eli would distract me with a show or song 
no one will make me smile like he did. 
David would tell me shut up.
no one says it like him. 

02:24am 
you pushed for so much 
and when i can finally give it.
you stop pushing. 
so i push  
and you avoid.

02:21am
I only knew them..
I don't know how to do this without them.

02:19am
I wonder if i can ever forgive myself

It's at this point that I'm starting to understand what people mean when they say a tattoo lasts forever.
When I look at my body and see only what used to be but is no longer there. 
When I am constantly reminded of some of my hardest moments.
At the time I thought they would be reminders of what I overcame- but today they feel like reminders of pain.
They feel like I'm telling the world of a moment I feel stuck in, they feel like a scream for help that was ignored. They feel like a part of my life that I can't stop carrying.

I feel trapped by who I was in that moment.

he's just so cuUuUuUute!
AH!!!

now my belly will ache in the name of poor self regulation.
you won't question it until the 34th hour.
cause that's all you ever noticed. 
telling you i'm not doing well wasn't enough.
it always took a hunger strike to earn your attention.
one day i will be above this all.
one day i won't yearn for your concern at all.