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You did make me feel worse. I was going to come back because I found a letter I wrote to you for your 18th birthday. I was going to give it to you and leave; not say a word to you because you hurt my feelings. But you know what? Maybe the harshness is what I need to hear; but I dont want to hear it from you. I can take it from amyone else; hell I can take the world falling apart at my feet and being pulled in every possible direction because Ive learned to just cope with whatever is being thrown at me. But I cant take it from you. I cant take it when youre saying youre still mine. &' I sure as hell cant take you saying your in a relationship that isnt right because of me. I just cant. I hurt myself. I do. Im always drunk. Always high. Always trying to find things to keep my mind off the fact that I feel so, so alone. I hate that Im still, even after all if this time, Im trying so desperately to find anything to put a little happiness back into my life. Your smile, your freakin laugh. I dont know why we keep meeting up. Its tearing me apart. How do you expect me to be on the swings with you one minute then a few hours later be right next to him. Right back to the person that makes me feel like Im nothing. But its my fault, I know. &" Just so you know, I camt ever sleep either. I want to run away forever but theres no way to do it. Ive thought of every possibility and you know what, Ill find a way to cope. I always do.
Mental illness may feed of you, but you do NOT feed of mental illness. YOU were there before it and you will be there after it. It may take a while, it may take more than once, but all things that are worth it do.
Keep breathing x

#mentalhealthawareness
The female doesn’t want a rich man or a handsome man or even a poet, she wants a man who understands her eyes if she gets sad, and points to his chest and says : “Here is your home country.”




you have to accept
that some people are not made for deep conversations, or for holding you together when you’re about to fall apart, or for keeping you from unzipping your skin, or for talking you out of s.uicide, or to love you through the worst moments of your life. Some people are made for shallow exchanges, and ridiculous banter, and nothing more. And that’s okay. That doesn’t make them horrible people because they simply aren’t able to handle a storm like you. It doesn’t make you a bad person because you won’t divulge all the gritty details of your horror show. It makes you smart. You have to accept that there will be people that cannot give you what you need. It doesn’t mean they are not worth keeping in your life. You just have to figure out who these ones are before you’re disappointed. And you have to keep them at arm’s length. You cannot expect everyone in your life to understand, to be nonjudgmental, to get it. But that’s okay, because not everyone was made to impart wisdom, or wax-poetic, or speak on politics and the depravity of society, or discuss how crucial it is that the stigma of mental illness be abolished. There are times when you have to get away from all that heaviness. You have to. And you will need superficial conversation about Kim Kardashian’s a.rse, or a debate on the color of The Dress. You will need those ones. So don’t go round cutting people off and dropping your friends. You need people for all your seasons. You need people or you won’t survive this.

format-br0kenwings LEAVE THIS HERE PLEASE.


Love is also a violence,
AND CANNOT BE UNDONE.
 
© format coded by: br0kenwings
Please don't remove this, or make it invisible!

We happened.
Like a f.ucking circus blowing through town, we happened,
left wrappers and pinwheels littering the ground like dead bodies.
Like the end of a war.
You moved around the house so gracefully, never touching me,
and I laughed because I thought
it was your best act,
waited hours for your hands because I didn’t
want to miss the rest of the show.
We walked past each other
like a trapeze act, like acrobats
on a tightrope, arms spread
on either side like it would save them from falling,
and we were the best act around.
The tent opened, and we were beautiful, effortless, jumping through
rings of fire, catching each other in mid-air, wearing our best clothes.
You loved me so well with the doors open.
You loved me so well with an audience,
but I don’t want the circus anymore.
I don’t want it.
I want to bury it six feet under,
mourn it like a casualty and then move on.
Chalk it up to something that sounds
less like an empty fairground where
we fired our first shots, where we
first started to fracture like a bone.
We may not have worked, but,
my God,
were we good at pretending.
My God,
were we something to look at.

– Caitlyn Siehl





My life used to be full of everything. Now if you aren’t with me I haven’t a thing in the world.





 

Life is what it is, baby.

I dont know what it is, but whatever it is, thats what it is, and there aint a thing we can do about it other than live it while we have it or forget it forever.
And one day you will remember this remember that but never remember me because you didn't love me... but you loved the way I treated you... I was so unique in my ways of showing you my love.... without a touch I made you feel uff.... that time I took you out to the point of a view a field full of sunflower & roses and i the bee without you  being honey I'm attached to you ufff like asd on a keyboard if only I could be the s instead of the n !

Don't cry because he left you.
Cry because tears are the only way to let go of your feelings.

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