Dudu*

Status: working...yay.
Joined: June 1, 2013
Last Seen: 1 day
user id: 361860
Gender: F

This turned into my diary somehow.


i have a black dog. 


I'm still learning new things about myself.  I'm sorry for the spam.

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Quotes by Dudu*

 
all those nights
you kept me going 
(Swirled you into all of my poems).
Now we're at the starting line,
I did my "time".

 


 there's really no point in me holding onto you, i know.
we'll never become the people i want us to be, i know.
i'm burning myself everytime i text you back...i know.
i know but i still have hope.
that when you dream, it's of me.
that when things fall into place, you'll search for me.
that when you finally start thinking for yourself,
you realise it's always been me.
 
i gave you more assurance than i needed to
i helped you out far more than i needed to
i talked to you for far longer than i needed to
i pined for you for longer than i admit to
i waited for you for longer than i wanted to

i bet you question why i did that for you
i ask myself why i did that too

perhaps it's because i always see myself in you
perhaps i gave you the love i needed too
and someday i'll get it in return, in two-fold, too
closure would look like a ring on my finger.
closure would feel like your arms around me.
closure would be waking up next to you,
everyday for the rest of my life. 

i like the way you love, i want that for myself.
don't you get that i know you...perhaps better than anyone else?
don't you know that a love like mine comes only once in a lifetime?
i can't shake feeling like i'm written for you and you for me.
i keep thinking i'm your missing piece.
i've been living off the crumbs of your love
and i'm starving now.
i don't want to care about you anymore!
if we're meant to be then i think it should have already happened by now.
where is the man i marry?
you wanted to be rory, but i'm afraid it's me.
i'm not prepared to wait thousands of years for you to realise it's me.
how do i shake this feeling, doctor?
i still pray for you.
i still have hope for you.
even if i shouldn't,
i still want you.
one day i won't care this much.
one day it won't hurt this much.
i still wish so badly that you would understand me. that you would know me.
i wish you would check in with me genuinely.
there's so much that has happened to me.
i wish you would show me your love in the ways that i wanted you to.
i wish you told me how perfect i was already.
i wish you never compared me to others.
i wish you would just know me and accept me as i am.

i don't think you'll ever know to what extent you've hurt me.
i just feel like you should know me by now.
know me beyond the foods i like to eat.
i wish you knew my other preferences.
i wish you knew and accepted. but you just can't ever seem to accept me.
i didn't ask to be this way. i am just the way i am.

there are things i wish i could change so you could accept me but i just can't.
i don't know which parts were nature and which were nuture.
all i know is that you have never accepted all of me.
i don't even know how you see me.
must be some weird mixture of ungrateful and detached. you must think i've shut everything off completely just to spite you.
but i am not like that.
i wish you knew me.

i think if you knew me mum, then you would truly love me.
chase two girls
lose 'the one'