*anachronism*

I watched you look at me and I swear
To God I felt a fire ignite that day when you
 Looked into my eyes my broken heart skipped so
Many beats it threatened to pull back the
Broken peices and make me whole again. I watched
As our love burst into flames - flames in which I thought
Would burn forever and maybe that was from my own
Stupidity to think that we would last forever in a place
Where forever only meant a day or two a place where
Broken hearts and used liquor bottles littered the 
Souls of the living a place in which our fiery love was on
The edge of being contained.
A place where the ashes of our past
Loves threatened to tear us apart.

I'm   just  so  tired  and    scared
and  sad   because   you   don't
see  me  the way I see you and
you're   t he    humming   in   my
veins   while   I'm   just  the  dust 
on                your                fingertips.


 

IT  WOULD  TAKE  TWO  AND   A    HALF 
LIFETIMES TO COUNT THE  MYRIAD  OF
STARS  BUT  I WOULD DO IT FOR YOU IF
YOU ASKED  ME TO. IT  WOULD  TAKE 3 
SYLLABLES  TO SAY "I LOVE YOU" YET 
YOU  WOULD  NEVER DO  THAT FOR ME.
NOW I KNOW THAT LIFE ISN'T ALWAYS
FAIR BUT TELL ME, HOW IS THAT RIGHT?

                 
"I would do it for you"



 

Format by destabilise.

"I miss you."
              ×
"Babygirl I'm right here."
              ×
"But you're not here. You're however many miles away, but not here beside me. I'm missing arms that have never held me,
hands I've never felt, eyes I've never seen, lips I've never kissed. My heart aches to trace the veins that pattern your skin,
those faint blue lines that travel up and down arm with the slightest bulge that would facinate me endlessly. All I want is
nothing more than for you to be by my side at this moment in time, inches away rather than state. I want you to be here 
in person so I can watch how my name tumbles like a prayer from your mouth, how your lips form each letter carefully,
as if each one was fragile an needed to be spoke with care. I want you within arms reach so I can lean over to kiss your 
cheek, shaking you from your deep thoughts. I don't want you so far to where I couldn't feel your heartbeat or the way 
your chest rises and falls with each breath. You've told me that you've never known a gentle touch, and I want to be the 
first you feel. I want to be with you in person, to learn all the litte habits you have, like the way your tounge pokes out
of your mouth while your pen inks a page, bringing a creation to life; or the way you run a hand through your hair when 
you're annoyed, messing it up just enough to give you that innocent bedhead look as well the sense someone had just been
pulling on it with pleasure, or the way you bite your lip while you're lost in thought. I want to learn the quirks you don't
know about, like the way you'd hold my hand, softly grazing the pad of your thumb over the top of my hand because it 
makes you feel secur; or the way you find yourself cracking your knuckles when you're nervous; or the way your fingers
find your eyelashes, because you like their softness. I just want more. How does that song go, the one by that band I know
you hate? If these sheets were the states and you were miles away, I'd fold them end over end to bring you closer to me.
And you know how much I hate folding from the numerous times I've dome my laundry on the phone with you. God, I
love you, but I want something more tangilbe than a phone call goodnight.

Je sens une ivresse qui m'anéantit
»«
I feel an intoxication that destroys me

I've always had a thing for bad boys, the  ones who  don't know  what they're doing
so just  say they're "living", who   don't know  where they're going so they just say
"anywhere but here"/ The ones who wear  fake leather land white t-shirts  and  worn
out shoes over marred skin and charred lungs./ The ones who slam doors and brood
silently  to prove  a point  that they don't  believe in  themselves./ Boys who swear
too much and fix their hair  just to seem like they don't care  when in reality they're
actually worried abou t everything and  everyone. / The ones  who don't  know how 
to be nice because they need a cold heart to keep them alive.

I've never  had a  thing for  good boys,  the  who know what  they're doing and call
it "living", the ones  who know  where they're  going  and say that  "here is fine for
now"./ The ones  who  wear  real  cotton  and  blue  jeans and broken in shoes over
scuffed knckles and warm  skin./ The  ones  who  smile  at  the  ground  and  listen
closley to debate on  ideas they  don't  quite  believe  in  just  yet./ Boys who don't
swear around kids and are always  messing  up  their  hair  and  laugh like they care
about everything  and everyone./ The  ones who are constantly  being  nice  because
they need a beating heart to keep them alive.

It's always been bad boys for me, and you're not one.
It's  always been good girls for you, and I'm not one.

××
MÉRCI POUR LE VENIN.
—————
THANK YOU FOR THE VENOM.
××

Latley all I can think about is you, and the way you could whisper
my name when ever you were upset and the way you always wanted
to hold my hand because you loved the way our skin felt when it was
pressed together. I've been thinking about the veins on your body and
the way I would trace them with my fingers as if they were a map that
would lead me straight to your heart. I've been thinking about the single
lonely freckle on your left knuckle and the way I would kiss it so it didn't
feel so alone. I've been thinking about you too much, you're the only
thing I can think straight about & latley all I can think about is you.