When beautiful people say "I'm so ugly" and you're thinking
"What does that make me... an ogre????"
All mine ©
I'ts Only Mean When You Mean What You Say.That's Why They're Spelled The Same!! Get It??
I Feel Like A Complete Idiot When I Try To Tell A Joke And No One Laughs So I Make It Awkward By Saying
"*Sigh* That Was Funny"
I Love The Fact That Mcdonalds Salads Including The Ranch Or Dressing Are More Fattening Than A Cheeseburger
This Is A True Fact, I Learned It In Gym :D
Me:You're not being very nice mom!! Mom:Who said I was nice?? My mom says this to me all the time.
Who Else Jokes Around About Robbing A Bank?? I Know I Can't Be The Only One
Mom:Here, do you want some vegetables?? Me:What are you crazy?? Mom:Yea but what does that have to do with anything?? Ha, I love my mom :D
If only hitting somebody with a plastic bag TRULY inflicted pain I love it when my mom does this to my dad
Dad:Is that Jamie Lee Curtis?? Mom:No, Jamie Lee Curtis is a woman, that's Tommy Lee Jones Dad:I still think it's Jamie Lee Curtis Oh, the conversations my parents have, I laughed so hard when i heard this.
Don't You Hate It When Your Shoe Makes That Farting Noise And Someone Automatically Thinks That You Farted
yep, that happened to me