I'm trying to reach out. But no one is listening. I've

I'm trying to reach out.
But no one is listening.
I've fallen in a ditch, more like a grave.
Will no one help pull me out?
I feel like im dying.
Is this my home now?
I dont belong here.
I feel unwanted.
I'm not who I want to be, nor whom they want me to be.
Who am I besides the girl's name that is so-called mine.
It's amazing to witness the ones that come to hep on their own.
it's amazing to witness it's the ones that want to be there...
Just to finally have an excuse as to why I should "give in".
Just to finally have an excuse as to why I should do what it is they want me to do.
Where did you go?
Nowhere. 
You've been here all along.
Doing nothing.
Do I deserve that?
Do I deserve the nothing you're giving?
What do I deserve?
I thought I was better.
I thought I finally did it.
I thought I finally made it.
Truthfully, there are so many there.
But they're waiting for something that is never going to happen.
It's a test, can't they see? 
Its a test that none of us are passing. 
I'm losing grip and no one is doing anything.
My hands are hurting, as well as my body, and heart.
End this pain, I beg. 
End it.
its happened one too many times these past 7 years, one too many.
I'm trying to reach out.
But no one is listening.