wittyfood
Status:
Joined: July 20, 2012
Last Seen: 1 decade
user id: 319050
Joined: July 20, 2012
Last Seen: 1 decade
user id: 319050
34
Quotes
121 Favorites
1 Following
7 Followers
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Comments on Quotes
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Quote Comments by User
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121 Favorites
1 Following
7 Followers
Comment Points
Comments
Comments on Quotes
Comments by User
Quote Comments by User
Flair
wittyfood's Favorite Quotes
When does the narwhal bacon?
Dobby:
Dobby didn't mean to kill anyone. Only to maim... or... seriously injure.
Dobby didn't mean to kill anyone. Only to maim... or... seriously injure.
Me: Hey i just fuucked you.
Me: And this is crazy.
Me: But you didn't wear a condom.
Me: And we're having a baby.
Him: What?!?
Me: jk i'm on the pill
Him: oh my god...
Me: And this is crazy.
Me: But you didn't wear a condom.
Me: And we're having a baby.
Him: What?!?
Me: jk i'm on the pill
Him: oh my god...
You:
Hello
Stranger: If you are a h.orny man, leave now.
You: I'm not. I just have a question.
Stranger: What?
You: Okay, I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you're looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money... but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that will be the end of it - I will not look for you, I will not pursue you... but if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you... and I will kill you. I am contemplating if I should because I love your mother. Help me.
Stranger: Top quote.
You: OMG!!
You: wittian!! fellow?
Stranger: Yep :]
We are now following eachother ;) thelifeofadreamer
Stranger: If you are a h.orny man, leave now.
You: I'm not. I just have a question.
Stranger: What?
You: Okay, I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you're looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money... but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that will be the end of it - I will not look for you, I will not pursue you... but if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you... and I will kill you. I am contemplating if I should because I love your mother. Help me.
Stranger: Top quote.
You: OMG!!
You: wittian!! fellow?
Stranger: Yep :]
We are now following eachother ;) thelifeofadreamer
I will never know
why
Kristen Stewart would be
kissing a 41 year old man when she's got Robbert Pattinson
at home
I have come to the conclusion
that nutella is angel
poop.
