AcousticMess11

Status: Help, I have done it again. I have been here many times before. Hurt myself again today, and the worst part is there's no one else to blame.
Joined: November 20, 2011
Last Seen: 1 decade
Birthday: November 11
user id: 241040
Location: New Jersey
Gender: F

Hey.
Well, I'm Maggie. My birthday's November 11th. I'll be 18 this year.
I could tell you all these things, like I'm okay at singing and playing guitar, I'm always, ALWAYS listening to music, and I want to be a pediatric surgeon. I could go on about things like that, but that's not the real me. Not yet, anyway.
I'm pretty screwed up, actually. I haven't always been this way, but my mom died in November of 2010, so that destroyed me. I'm not going to make my life sound better than it is, but I'm not going to make it sound worse, either. I just want to tell it how it is. My mom had lung cancer. And she was my best friend. I grew up with separation anxiety from her, so I was her tail. I never left her, except to go to school, which often made me sick, just doing that. I never had much of a social life, except going to the bowling center, where my mom bowled, too. Anyway, long story short. Separation anxiety. It sucked. And then she got cancer and I never left her, then, either. She slept on the couch for 6 out of the 9 months she suffered, and I slept on a chair next to her. I started cutting myself then, and I stopped eating while she was in the hospital. She'd tell my dad to make me eat, but that didn't work too well. So yeah, there started my battle with self-harm and eating disorders, which I still battle every day. When my mom died, I went into a depression that I've almost started to come out of. My family is helping me so much, as are my best friends. My older sister and brother and their families finally became a part of our lives. Unfortunately, it took my mom's death for that to happen... Anyway, I think I'm getting off track. I do have a lot of good things in my life. I have goals and a family that helps me. I don't fully connect with my dad or brother that I live with, which is difficult. But I get out of this hell-hole house as often as possible and I'm working on my issues. I'm not even close to better yet, but I'm getting there. So, that's my story. That's why I am the way I am. My other traits include stubborn, sarcastic, emotional, independent, insecure, and caring. I care about others so much that it hurts me. I don't care about myself. But, that's just another thing I'm working on. So, yeah. Anyway, I'm really bad at telling stories and everything. I tend to ramble. But I like talking to people, so talk to me? 
 

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