I am so sick and tired of being
second best. Or third best. Or worse. I just want to be
good enough to be someone's one and only BEST FRIEND.
Why can't I ever be good enough? I want to be the one
that someone ALWAYS comes to, adores, and trusts completely. I
want someone who cares about me more than they care about ANYONE
else, and I want to have the same feelings for them. Every time I
see a friends with their best friend, I explode with jealousy.
Because I don't have that. I probably never will. I
just want the feeling of knowing that I'm someone's
favorite. Because right now, I feel pretty
unwanted.
-Sorry, just needed to vent. :/
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Athenalena
1 decade ago
Honey, I know how you feel, I went through a phase when I was like that, and then I lost my 'best friend.' she turned out to be a , and everyone around me didn't know why I was her friend in the first place. I was so focused on keeping her as my best friend because it was my freshman year of high school, and I had a group of 6 best friends, 4 went to another school, and two came with me. One of the two turned into a and I miss her so much, but it's not the same, the other is now my best friend, and I realized you can't be someone's one and only best friend, unless they let you be, meaning they have no others. But my remaining best friend from my old school doesn't trust me. She never told me she was suicidal. And now were still friends, and I'm hanging out with another girl, and it makes me reallly jealous when I realize she had plans with two other girls I don't like and that she was going to the water park with them. Then she was going to the mall. Then out to eat. Then I realized, hey, I still have fun with her, evven though it still makes me jealous, this new girl is becoming my other best friend, so now I have two, I know it's confusing, we hang out at the pool five times a week at least, bake food together, take cake decorating classes, and shop at the mall together, she's becoming my best friend, even though she has other ones, and so do I, I get upset, because she's not only focused on me. Which makes upset, but I realized I cannot be her one and only, there will always be another person, so I will enjoy the time we have together :)
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