Have you ever just bottled it in, so you don't be a burden?

Have you ever just bottled it in, so you don't be a burden? To not feel like an attention seeker because of that thing inside of you, making you feel this way? You feel horrible, since you know you have it better than others. You feel like you have no right to feel this way. You are hiding. You've perfected that fake smile so no one knows about what's going on inside. You've acted so happy so much that you actually started believing it and then crashed down. You want to end it all. Have you? Have you ever?