This
boy at Target asked if I would hold his hand because his ex
girlfriend just walked in with a new
guy, so naturally I felt bad and held his hand while strolling
around Target for a bit. Then it donned on me, with no
other couple in sight, that was
the best damn pick up line ever
pulled
*Me walking into Target*
Me: Do you sell friends here?
Clerk: Excuse me?
Me: I was looking for friends. Do you sell them cheap here?
Clerk: Um, like the Lego set?
Me: No! Friends that you bring to school and talk to.
Me: I don't need friends with fancy clothes, I just want to know if you sell them.
Clerk: I don't think you can buy friends.
Me: Oh so are they usually left at the side of highways and we just pick them up?
Clerk: Why don't you just try Wal-Mart?
Me: Do you sell friends here?
Clerk: Excuse me?
Me: I was looking for friends. Do you sell them cheap here?
Clerk: Um, like the Lego set?
Me: No! Friends that you bring to school and talk to.
Me: I don't need friends with fancy clothes, I just want to know if you sell them.
Clerk: I don't think you can buy friends.
Me: Oh so are they usually left at the side of highways and we just pick them up?
Clerk: Why don't you just try Wal-Mart?
when I was in middle school I cut my hair really short and
these guys were making fun of me and I was like shut the
f.ck up and one guy said “well at least I don’t look like a boy”
Wat o-o
Have you ever read something that
killed you inside?
Like a text message or someone's status.
Everything was fine until you accidentally came across something you didn't want to read.
Or found out something you were better off not knowing.
It's almost as if it were posted just to purposely hurt you.
But you constantly read it over and over just to torture yourself.
It stinks that one little thing can ruin your whole entire day.
Like a text message or someone's status.
Everything was fine until you accidentally came across something you didn't want to read.
Or found out something you were better off not knowing.
It's almost as if it were posted just to purposely hurt you.
But you constantly read it over and over just to torture yourself.
It stinks that one little thing can ruin your whole entire day.
Music
Teacher: everyone will be singing a song of my
choice in front of the class.
Me: no.
Music Teacher: this will take place next week.
Me: you're asking for death
Me: ...and to be burried alive then dragged out of your grave
Me: ...and stomped on by heavy angry elephants
Me: ...and thrown into a pool of sharks while on your period
Me: ...and finally turned into a shooting target
Me: no.
Music Teacher: this will take place next week.
Me: you're asking for death
Me: ...and to be burried alive then dragged out of your grave
Me: ...and stomped on by heavy angry elephants
Me: ...and thrown into a pool of sharks while on your period
Me: ...and finally turned into a shooting target
how are there eleven year olds in
relationships and kissing and stuff when i can't even talk
to the check out lady at target without stuttering.
to be sure of hitting the target,
shoot first, and call whoever you hit the target
shoot first, and call whoever you hit the target
Today
at target
with
my sister;
Me:
It stinks.
My sister:
It does. Then you walk past the flavored candles.
Me:
Flavored candles? You mean scented candles?
My sister:
*Laughs*
Me:
It stinks.
My sister:
It does. Then you walk past the flavored candles.
Me:
Flavored candles? You mean scented candles?
My sister:
*Laughs*
