When I was in the hospital
I was roomed with a schizophrenic
And she was the most gentle person I have ever met
There was a boy with a long deep slit across his neck
Who told very funny jokes
A girl who never spoke a word
Would draw the most beautiful pictures
The boy who shook with anxiety
Could hold the most intelligent conversations
Even the girl who screamed in her sleep and picked at her
skin
Had a heart the size of the ocean
We are not who you think we are
Oceans
I feel when it begins
as the tide yanks me around,
tugging me,
and the water churns,
dark and stormy,
ready to take its chance
My chest tightens
as my lungs fill with sea foam
with brilliant shades of white and pale green,
their hues choking me s l o w l y
My legs are weights
and I'm wearing cement,
and I begin sinking to the bottom of the sea,
coughing and sputtering and gasping for air
I struggle to hold onto the world
or what’s left of it –
the small sliver of light I can see,
shimmering above me
There’s nothing to grasp onto,
nothing to anchor me.
Funny,
How that only makes me sink
The waves c r a s h
and so do I,
I keep drowning like there is no bottom,
simply unexplored ocean,
taking me to depths even shipwrecks have never been
maybe,
that's all i'll be,
a shipwreck
torn into pieces at the bottom of the world,
right from whence i came
and If I survive
I know I’ll have to face these waters again;
I always do
it's as sure as the high and low tides,
as sure as my own highs and lows,
And I know the oceans will be waiting.
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destabilise